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「ねえ、 今すぐ会いたいよ」
Sunday, February 28, 2010  Here comes the Sequel. at 4:13 PM |
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Sora speaking, and honestly I have no idea why I am speaking. Although my words seem harsh at the moment, I guess I probably shouldn't be writing this post right now. But because my patience lacks and my head is currently a ticking bomb I'll get this over with before I crash and burn. Tomorrow's March right? Well, I don't want to break my promise and not tell "him" that I still "like him". So, by the end of this day, I'll end it that way. I'll tell him for sure as soon as he gets on msn. It may sound lame to tell such things over msn, but honestly my mind was too occupied with other BS that my mind went somewhere else and forgot to tell him. I regret it, that I must admit. Telling him, I guess, I'll call it the end of this horrid and miserable depression that I've been through lately. Usually in regular posts, it seems more... "colourful" in terms of: having a picture somewhere between the lengthy words, a few Japanese emoticons (or overdose), but I don't think that this post should require much attention. My usage of words, and probably the tone of how I typed it up, probably reveals that there's something wrong. Of course there is, there's always something wrong. But isn't the point of life to live beyond those that are wrong and see what is right. I'm not sure if I'm phrasing things correctly, but I don't want to over think so much due to my tiredness. My personality, is at times considered "cold" and I come here and there, but I probably do care, but I guess I'm a bit serious right now? Sorry. I don't expect "you" to read it, but read it if you want to, or if you have "time" to. Dear Nina, Most likely, this is the final letter that I'll write to you. I won't write one by hand and give it to you, because at this point, I probably won't be able to control my disappoints from you if I was to see you face to face. I seem fine don't I? But honestly, I'll be strong through the end. I'll keep my promise, that if you do such things again then I'll leave you, do you remember? Last year, during exams, that time I was mad at you when you were last drunk. I told you, I told myself, I told Kokoro, I told Ona, that if it happens again, I'll surely give up on you. I seem like a hypocrite, cause I drank too, but for you, it was at an extent. At the time, I was ashamed of knowing you, I thought, why did I bother with this kind of person? But then I got to the point that I got angry and pissed, but now, just don't expect me to care. If you dare say, "I don't care" then knock yourself out, and see if other people I care. My words are harsh, that I understand, I probably shouldn't be saying "nananana, you deserve it you deserve it." But more so, I think that you should consider what you do deserve. I understand that there's more difficulty along the way, but that one day, that ONE day, you had to choose that day? You know how I am, I give only one chance, and after that trust is ruined, then don't expect much afterwards. Maybe I'm selfish, maybe I don't have the right to say these words, but I guess I threw that out of the window. |
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Name: Sora (원숭이)
